With regards to the topic of anger with God as well as the Year of Mercy, you might find this interview with Cris Heffron of St. Anthony Messenger to be of interest.
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Thank you for sharing this interview, Richard. I do remember your telling me it was okay to lash out at God because he could take it. I did. He did. Somehow, through that process, I felt his presence. In the exhaustion after raging and venting, I felt comforted and held.
Since then, I repeat the process without hesitation, as often as warranted. There is an inexplicable serenity that paradoxically settles over me, even though I still don’t understand the “why” of the situation and I still have no solution for the problem causing all the pain. God is present, always present.
Like you, I need a personal God with whom I can have it out when necessary. Thanks to you, I can now wisely tell others that “it’s okay to let God have it! He can take it.” They may think I’m crazy, but at least they’re receiving compassion, rather than judgment, from me.
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I really appreciated the interview. And all through it I kept thinking of Merton’s words, “God isn’t someone else,” and that caused me to remember the amazing work by Jung “Jung’s Answer To Job.” Of course, from the Jungian perspective, the drama in Job’s life and between him and God took place entirely in the inner world–in the psyche. For me, God is not only my divine core but life itself. My intention and my quest is to become a student of life and a student of the divine within me so that at the same time that I’m pissed off and screaming at the divine within and at life, I’m also daring to ask myself, “What purpose does this madness serve?” I can feel my sadness, grief, disappointment, anger, fear, or whatever emotion and still allow myself to be taught by whatever suffering I’m experiencing. The time between these two events may be long, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that I eventually do both.
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My anger towards God was white hot. I was pissed beyond hell. Later I felt shame, self-loathing and fear. Some time after that God showed me what was good about myself and gave me hope. Not exactly the way I react to people who hate ME. I should point out that there are some people who do not have my contentious relationship with God. Victor Frankl is one of them.
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