Today I learned that actor Robert Duvall died. Perhaps more than any other actor, his different roles aided my own spiritual journey. Mac Sledge from Tender Mercies helped me address suffering that doesn’t make sense. His role in True Confessions helped me address issues in my own relationship with my brother. And Augustus McRae of Lonesome Dove helped me in many ways. More than anything, he was a passionate man who accepted people as they were (with the noticeable exception of a bartender in San Antonio!)

But Boo Radley came to me with an important spiritual lesson early in my journey. This performance was early in Robert’s career but provided a character in image that has stayed with me on my journey for over 60 years.

As my personal homage to this great actor, I am reposting with revisions this piece.

My favorite book and movie are To Kill a Mockingbird. When I first read the book, when I finished I turned back to page 1 and read it again. The first time I saw the movie I went back the next night to see it again. The book and movie have greatly impacted my life.

As I noted in an earlier post, Atticus Finch gave me a role model for being a father. But I also am drawn to one other figure who appears infrequently but looms large throughout the story. That figure is Boo Radley.

Boo was a neighbor who, by and large, was a recluse, kept at home in part because of a violent incident. Boo would probably be diagnosed as schizophrenic nowadays. Yet Boo becomes attached to the Finch children and starts to give them small gifts — a school spelling medal, a pocket knife, a broken watch and chain and other little surprises the children would find in a knothole of a tree.

Being a recluse, however, Boo was someone of whom the children were both afraid and intrigued by. As their friend Dill says, “Wonder what he does in there? Wonder what he looks like?”, starting an effort to make Boo Radley come out. And come out he does in a powerful act of self-sacrifice.

Why am I drawn to Boo? I think in part because I have parts of me that I kept locked up and perhaps continue to keep locked up, mainly out of some sort of fear. Thus, for example in my own case, I kept creativity locked up out of fear of being criticized. Perhaps you have kept a part locked up as well. Out of fear, some of us keep locked up our capacity for loving. Boo did not!

I realize too that, especially in retirement, I have great potential to be reclusive. Perhaps I always did. After all, I learned some years ago that within the El Paso professional community I was viewed as reclusive.

We know that the Shadow part of our personality comes bearing a gift, just as Boo Radley did. But to receive that gift, we have to find a way to let our own Boo Radley come out. I don’t know that I have been successful in that endeavor.

Here then is the beautiful scene after Boo Radley comes out (And, yes, that is a very young Robert Duvall as Boo!)

Thank you Robert for your many ways of helping me on my own journey. RIP

Reflection: What is your inner Boo Radley like? Have you been able to let him/her out in some way?